I Am a Mother

To be a mother...

It is to deal with disappointment and unmet expectations. To learn to let a small person decide for themselves, make choices, and face the consequences — even when everything inside you tightens with fear.

It is to stand and watch as he confidently pulls tricks on his bicycle. To worry that he will fall, get hurt... and stay silent. Simply trust him. Know that he will manage. Because in this little human you already see the adult — the one who is only preparing to sprout.

To be a mother is to accept that he is different. That he thinks differently and may want something for himself other than what I want for him. It is every day resisting the urge to build the "right" path for him. And instead — to catch his interest at its very beginning, see its value, and give him a chance to develop it.

It is to believe in yourself again and again, even when for the tenth time your hands drop and it seems that all efforts are in vain. To believe that this child chose me as their mother — for some reason known only to them. And that I chose them — for my own reasons. And this bond is forever. All my life I will be the mother of this person. The one who once lived under my heart, whom I gave birth to, breastfed, carried in my arms... and now he is almost my height, and we already wear almost the same shoe size.

To be a mother is to accept everything in them. My own traits — those that delight and those that irritate. Their father's traits — kind and not so kind. The elusive echo of grandmothers and grandfathers. And to be grateful. Grateful to all these people — distant and close — for having managed. For their lives, their struggles, their love led here — to this moment, to this child, to the continuation of their life.